Don't get me wrong, I am so blessed and so thankful to be Mrs. Ricley. I have grown and evolved because of my relationship with Brett, and I know that God has given him to me to challenge me, correct me, help me lighten up a bit and constantly love me despite my shortcomings. I am also so incredibly blessed and thankful to be Jonathan's mom. My heart has grown so much since he entered the world and He has taught me more about being selfless, patient and gentle than I ever thought possible. With that said, and even though it is difficult to do at times, God still tells me to love HIM more.
So, the sermon in church today was centered on this very thought, that we cannot forsake our first love. The passage referenced was from Revelation 2 and the letter to the church at Ephesus. They were told, "you have forsaken the love you had at first. Consider how far you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first", and I feel like that is what God has been saying to me repeatedly over the past month. I have allowed the other loves in my life to take precedence over the One that should be first. I have been searching for my satisfaction, my value and my contentment in the wrong places and I need to return to the only place where those needs are truly satisfied.
I want to return to my First Love, my God and the One who deserves so much more than I give Him. I am daily humbled at the fact that God is revealing and teaching me these things about myself. I am thankful that even though I fail Him daily, He keeps reaching down and reminding me that I am worthy of His love.